Jealousy...

Jealous… Suspicious that we do not enjoy the affection or respect of others, or that another is more loved and respected than ourselves….

Ouch.

Seems to me that jealousy and security are mutually exclusive. That security must be in both the relationship with other individuals, and within.

I’m secure in my marriage relationship. I have no cause for jealousy, no threat of someone else being more loved than I am. I am loved.

I’ve become secure in my relationship with God. I have come to believe that he really and truly does love me, and that He will do what He says He will do….grant me the right-standing of Christ and an eternal life. I don’t need to be jealous in that relationship, because His love for you does not diminish His love for me in the slightest degree.

But I realize this morning that I am not innocent. There are areas of my life that are tainted with insecurity and jealousy. Even worse, I fear I may incite a little jealousy in others given the opportunity.

Joseph may have been guilty of such. Gen 37 tells the story. It’s worth your time to read it. Joseph was a love child, born to a man of many years. Israel/Jacob might have been wiser in his doting on the boy. Giving him a brightly colored coat to wear only displayed his favoritism to his other sons.

Everyone wore a garment like that, it was used for warmth, to sit on, to bundle things up in, or even as a security for a loan. But robes were plain. Except for the rich and famous…. Royalty.

Young Joseph’s father gave him the robe of royalty, and young Joseph wore it. Perhaps pridefully….maybe even for the purpose of inciting jealousy.

Or…maybe Joseph thought everybody loved him like his father did. He was young and unwise to flaunt what he had been given. And even more unwise in sharing his dream about being bowed down to by his big brothers. They took the opportunity to rid themselves of him when a caravan of slave traders came by.

This story is full of lessons for us. When I look into the character of each of the individuals involved, I see myself.

Are you there?

Father, I confess the jealousy in my heart. Thank You for revealing areas of sin, and Your cleansing from them. Thank You for the help and power You provide, that I may live a victorious life, free from the strong holding power of the sin of jealousy. (Gal.5:20)

Manipulating....

Manipulating… To manage or utilize skillfully. To control by artful means to one’s own advantage. To change by artful means to serve one’s purpose…

Manage. Control. Change.

When trusting God is a situational condition and not a complete way of life, I wonder that we are not guilty of trying to manipulate the Creator of the universe.

Faith in Him should not be a way out of a difficulty, but rather an in-place covenant relationship that provides comfort, strength, and resolve even as the moment of crisis unfolds.

We want God to meet whatever need we have at the moment. Especially when we haven’t been able to fill or meet that need for ourselves.

When we try to manipulate our environment and circumstances in order to meet our own needs, with no regard to He Who is Master and Creator, I fear we are guilty of idolatry. We so often put trust in people/things/self, placing them on the throne, with God waiting on the back burner…just in case we can’t pull it off.

When all else fails, how often do we then begin to bargain with Him?

How often do we exhaust every other avenue before throwing ourselves at His Feet?

Why is it that we seek after Him when we are faced with situations beyond our ability to manipulate, and don’t tip our hat to Him the rest of the time?

Or, maybe I’m the only one guilty. Maybe I’m the only one who forgets that the air I suck into my lungs is there only because of Him. Not to mention the health of the lungs that breathe in that life-sustaining oxygen.

Every time I successfully manipulate circumstances in my life to my advantage, I experience only a by-product of His blessed provisions.

HE pours HIS life into mine. I create nothing.

I dare not take the glory for what goes right and blame God when things go wrong.

Even the closer relationship I enjoy with Him is because He has revealed Himself to me. Yes, I must choose. Yes, I must obey. Yes, I must commit.

But try as I might, I would never know God were He not to reveal Himself TO me.

I have not learned how to successfully manipulate God. I am learning how to stop.

Now..

Now… If you are reading these words, you’re safe and blessed. You have a computer before you, eyes that see, a mind that has learned to read, and the opportunity of choice to use these next few minutes as you like…

Now is all you have. You may not finish this reading. (…if I even get to finish writing down these thoughts !)

What do we do with our ‘now’? And do we realize Who/who is responsible for this ‘now’? Everything I experience and enjoy in my life is attached to another ‘who’ and is absolutely because of ‘Who’. God has a say-so in everything that touches me, and every choice, every action I take or do not take, has an impact.

I must not live my life and make my decisions as if it’s only and all about me and this ‘now’.

Isaiah 39 tells the story of King Hezekiah. God had caused the sun to retreat backwards several degrees. The Assyrians, prominent world power of the day, worshipped the sun god. The Babylonians were enemies of the Assyrians, and they really liked that Hezekiah’s God had power over the sun. They thought it in their interest to befriend Hezekiah and his God.

So they came with gifts. And flattery.

Hezekiah accepted not only the gifts, but the flattery. Not only that, he did a little showing off.

“Hezekiah received the envoys gladly and showed them what was in his storehouses…the silver, the gold, the spices, the fine oil, his entire armory and everything found among his treasures. There was nothing in his palace or in all his kingdom that Hezekiah did not show them” (Isa. 39:2)

Do you think there was a little pride going on there? Ever notice how often that of which we become proud is that which is often taken away?

Oh, Hezekiah didn’t suffer much for it. But the very ones to whom he strutted were the predecessors of the ones who would come and destroy everything he had been so prideful of.

“The time will surely come when everything in your palace, and all that your fathers have stored up, will be carried off to Babylon. ..and some of your own flesh and blood who will be born to you, will be taken away, and they will become eunuchs in the palace of the king of Babylon.”

It’s not just about ‘now’. Yes, our choices are important for the immediate, but they have such a profound effect on what days lay ahead.

After Isaiah had informed Hezekiah about the real nature of his Babylonian friends, and what they would be capable of in the future, he replied…

‘….“The word of the Lord..is good.”….For he thought, ‘there will be peace and security in my lifetime.’…”(Isa. 39:8) He was concerned about his 'now'.

I am convicted today that I have enjoyed the peace and security of my lifetime, and horrified that the way we have lived in godless fashion may bring devastation in the days ahead.

God help us to repent of our wicked ways, turn back to You, seek Your Face, and humble ourselves completely. Forgive us for living in our ‘now’ and being blind to the consequences for our sons and daughters. Only You can heal what is so diseased and broken. Help each of us…ME…to be obedient in what You call us to do, help us to live our lives first and foremost for Your purposes…trusting that those purposes are always best for us.

Security

Security… protected from danger. How secure are you?

Do you pay for one of those security systems for your home so that when you are in danger, help will come to the rescue?

Do you have an arsenal ready to meet intruders?

Do you have securities? Stocks and bonds. Equities and options. Certificates. Mutual funds. Money in the bank?

Do you have a dead bolt on your door that would keep out the uninvited?


Just what is it that you put on the list of things that make you secure?


Perhaps it is government….the law of the land…laws that forbid anyone or anything to steal your secure status.

Perhaps it is medicine… physicians and surgeons….if/when sickness or injury comes, there should be a pill or treatment or a surgery to prevent your secure health from being compromised or lost.

Whatever it is you put on your list. It’s a lie.


There IS no security other than the eternal security in Jesus Christ.

Laws won’t do it, the Ten Commandments are a witness to that fact. Government won’t do it. It is impossible to legislate right behavior. There is a presence of evil in our world.

“for what the law was powerless to do in that it was weakened by the sinful nature, God did by sending His own Son…”(Rom. 8:3)

Money won’t do it. The value changes, it is unstable and unreliable. And what is it really except paper or chunks of metal? Who decides what it’s value is?

“Since you trust in your deeds and your riches, you too will be taken….”(Jer. 48:7)
“though your riches increase, do not set your heart on them.”(Ps. 62:10)

Guns and armies won’t do it. Battles and wars have been taking lives the entire history of our race, and still we struggle to be secure.

“Woe to those…who rely on horses, who trust in the multitude of their chariots and in the great strength of their horsemen, but do not look to the Holy One of Israel, or seek help from the Lord.” (Isa. 31:1)

“My hope is certain. My hope is something for my soul to hold on to. My hope is strong and secure. My hope goes all the way into the Most Holy Room behind the curtain. That is where Jesus has gone. He went there to open the way ahead of me…”
(Heb.6:19 NIrV personalized by me)


I am forever secure. Hallelujah.

Parenting

Parenting… Somebody should have warned me it would be so difficult !

And somebody should have explained that it’s never a done deal. Once a child is born to you, it’s a forever thing. A relationship that is multi-faceted and ever changing.

It is easy when they are little children. Though that time is so difficult, and so very very important. That time to a great degree determines the course of the rest of the relationship, thru the teens and into the adult years.

My parents are both still living as I write this. I wonder at their thoughts about the four of their children. I wonder at the concerns, the frustrations, the joy, the satisfactions…

I pray I have not caused them much frustration and heartache. I pray they spent few sleepless nights in concern for me.

Children have such an unrealistic idea about parents. I did. Only when I began to face some of the things I was so critical about did I appreciate my parents’ parenting.

Children have all the answers. Ever notice that? Young adults…they are just as wise as hoot owls! They often think so anyway. I did.

Now, the older I get, the more I realize how little I know, and how helpless I am.

I have a lot of regret about my parenting. The enemy would like to continue to use that, but he’s a defeated liar, and it’s a waste of time to continue to grieve over what is done.

2 Samuel 12 tells a good story about such as that. As long as there is life, there is hope in prayer against even death itself. If we bear guilt, it is right for us to grieve and repent.

And it is right that we ACCEPT forgiveness, get up, worship and love God for Who He is, and follow Him past the ‘now’.

The ‘now’ may be sad, even heart wrenching…but there comes a time to lay aside the sorrow and hurt…and we must never allow our enemy to influence us to allow the thing to stop us from worshipping God and following after Him.

Our failures are against God. Even those failures of parenting. And when we try to ‘fix’ them ourselves, we butt our heads against a wall if we do not go to Him first, for ‘…against You, You only, have I sinned…’ (Ps. 51:4)

“I will restore to you the years that the locust have eaten….” (Joel 2:25)

He is God. He can heal and restore ANYthing. Hallelujah !!

Sleeping

Sleeping… I haven’t done much of it the last couple weeks.

I remember when sleep was my escape. When I was stressed out about anything at all, I’d get sleepy…I could sleep right thru most anything.

When I was sad or mad, sorrowful or worried, I could just close my eyes and turn it off. I’ve slept thru bad storms, barking dogs…those days are gone.

I have joked that God wakes me up at night just to have some time alone with Him. I really believe He does that sometimes.

This morning, I read that Jesus slept thru a storm. “Without warning, a furious storm came up on the lake, so that the waves swept over the boat. But Jesus was sleeping.” (Matt.8:24)

Do you ever feel like Jesus is sleeping when there’s a storm raging in your life?

I know the answer to that.

The accuser and enemy of our souls would have us believe that Jesus is sleeping and even that He doesn’t care about the storm. He is a liar. (Rev. 12:10, John 8:44)

“Lord save us!!!” (Matt.8:25)

Jesus may have been asleep, the storm may have been frightful, but all was secure. The storm raged, the waves crashed….but all on the boat with Jesus were safe.

Hard for us to feel safe when there’s obvious danger. Even harder when circumstances bring harm, destruction, even death.

Hard for us to look past the storm. Not hard at all for Jesus.

Stay in the boat with Him. When the water is calm, don’t get out for a swim. When the storms come, don’t bail out to try to escape them.

And if you’re not in the boat….get in!! Then when the storms come, the waves crash and beat….call Him.

He is ‘Sar Shalom’. The Prince and Keeper of Peace.

Abba

Abba… In the language of scripture, it is the equivalent of ‘daddy’. Jesus called God ‘daddy’……

“Daddy, everything is possible for You. Take this cup from Me. Yet not what I want, but what You want…” (Mark 14:36 my translation)

I have so often thought about the relationship of father and child, and how our perception of the relationships with our earthly fathers colors our perception of our heavenly Father.

I have a good father. I call him ‘daddy’. I obeyed him without question. I never feared for my safety, but at the same time, never questioned the consequences of disobedience.

As an adult with children of my own, I’ve learned more and more about my daddy. My perceptions of him as a kid growing up were often so wrong. I thought he was too strict, when he was in fact enforcing boundaries that provided safety not just for the moment, but even now, continue to bring me security. I continue to be thankful for those boundaries.

All daddies aren’t good. That is a horrible truth. Some just walk away. Some are abusive in devastating ways. I pray especially for those people.

There was a period of my life when I thought my daddy was unapproachable. (He never was really..)

There was also a period of my life when I was not confident in approaching God. I assigned to God the image of my daddy. While I was hesitant and afraid to go to daddy with certain things, I was terrified to go to God ! (‘Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need. Heb.4:16 ‘In Him and through faith in Him we may approach God with freedom and confidence.’ Eph. 3:12 Hallelujah.!!)

Let’s not make God into the image of our daddy. Whatever fault there is in the relationship, ( and there are faults in all human relationships…) let’s not forget the tragedy of the garden. Humans all suffer from the disease of sin, we all share the incapacity of achieving perfection, especially in our relationships.

Our Daddy in heaven does not mirror our daddy on earth.

But we are so very blessed when our daddy here mirrors the Perfect Daddy of heaven.

I thank you Daddy for my daddy here, and for his commitment to You and to the family You entrusted to him. Give him long life and health.